Hello there friends! I know it’s been quite sometime since you’ve heard from me, but here I am with some of what I’ve learned this month. Honestly, this week for the most part.
Truth be told, this month has been a hard one. Finding ministry opportunities and trusting that God is using me even if I can’t see it has been hard. Team dynamics have been hard. Being away from home this month has been hard. I have found myself asking “What the is next for me today? Because right now it feels like I am at a stand still and I don’t know where to step”.
While worshiping one morning, Jesus and I started chatting. I asked Him “Where, Lord? Where do I go in this city to show Your love and Your grace to these people?” Softly spoken, I heard Him say, “You carry Me”. Bulldozing ahead, I continued telling Him why I couldn’t do ministry. “I don’t speak the language and I’m over simply smiling at people. God, that isn’t ministry. I want to change someone’s life!” Again, I heard those soft and simple words “You carry Me”. At that point, I was a little bit fed up. Here I was, telling Him why ministry was difficult and how I didn’t know how to step out and help people. “Listen, I know I carry You. I carry Your presence, Your love, Your power. I get all that. But I’m asking You to show me a way to do ministry here.” “You carry Me.”
Talk about annoyed. But I was done arguing for an answer that God clearly wasn’t going to give me. So I walked away from the conversation. I was over not being heard or being shown someone to help. But remember the whole “You carry Me” thing? Well, something else that comes along with that is you can’t really walk away. God just might continue speaking even when you’re annoyed. And when He does, as usual, it is exactly what you need to hear.
“Quynn, you do carry Me. My love, presence, power, and so much more. You want to change someone’s life, but that isn’t your job. When you are obedient to carry My presence, then I use you to change lives. Even if you don’t see it, I work through you, but I also work beyond you. So when you just smile at someone, I will work through and beyond. When you pray, even from a distance, I will work through and beyond. Because you are My hands and feet. You carry My grace and love on the earth. Which means you carry enough influence for a smile to be ministering to someone. You carry Me.”
Holy wow. A sending that truly took the breath out of me. God is so sweet and so gracious. This week He has partnered with me to show me ministry that I can do that I feel passionate about. But I share this with you because even when you don’t feel passionate or like you are helping shift things, you are. If you walk with Christ, then anywhere you go things are shifting. Continue stepping out in the everyday activities, praying even from a distance, and smiling at people. You carry Jesus, and that is a big sending.
